Breaking up with someone or getting dumped is never easy. Here are “5 Steps to Getting Over a Breakup” from someone who didn’t think it was possible until I did it.
Remember why you broke up in the first place
You broke up for a reason, so keep that in mind when you start to get weak and reminisce on the good times. Hell, if you have to, make a list of all the reasons your ex-kind of sucked and how the relationship did not benefit you anymore.
Get rid of all of their stuff and cut off all contact- immediately
Your life is now a “no-ex zone.” Hanging on to their t-shirts and lurking on their social media may seem tempting, but all it’s going to do is get you hurt. Do yourself a favor and block them on your socials and block their number. Feel bad? Science says people who are friends with their exes are psychopaths anyways. Oh, and for the love of god, avoid “ex-sex” at all costs for obvious reasons.
Give yourself the proper amount of time to heal and refigure out who you are
You’re used to being an “us” instead of just “you, ” and it makes jumping back into another relationship incredibly tempting. They say that getting under someone new is the best way to get over someone, but they also say that it takes half the time you were in the relationship to get over it. Science says that on average it can take up to three months for people to finally see the positive aspects of a breakup. While that time can be longer or shorter for you, you owe it to yourself to give yourself some alone time. Chances are, during your relationship you got out of touch with some aspects of who you are, and this is your time to get back in touch with them.
Let it hurt, then let it go
Ugly cry your eyes out in your car when you hear “your” song. Chug a whole bottle of wine (or three) when you find out he’s Facebook official with the girl he always told you not to worry about. Watch sad movies and mope around as much as you need to. Do whatever you have to do to get the hurt out, then move the hell on with your life. You don’t need to be the girl who has emotions of steel but you also sure as hell don’t need to be the girl who’s still in love with her ex six months down the line. Break-ups require a grief process, and going through every painful step is essential to make sure you come out happy on the other side.
Get better, not bitter
It may be hard to believe, but love is real, and it is out there for you. It’s okay to be bitter for a while, but you need to wake up and take responsibility for who you are as a person and why things didn’t work out on your end. Realize that you need to be the right person for yourself before you can be the right person for someone else, and work on the aspects of your personality that could use some fine-tuning. Get new hobbies. Strengthen your relationships with your friends and make new ones. Pursue your goals and dreams with passion. Start a whole new life. As they say, “happiness is the best revenge.”